


Living Proof

by ForgottenStorm87



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: College, F/M, Lemon, Long-Distance Relationship, Love Confessions, Romance, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:42:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26689846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForgottenStorm87/pseuds/ForgottenStorm87
Summary: The war is over. The pilots are moving on with their lives. Relena continues to work tirelessly to defend the peace as Vice Foreign Minister. In this new time of peace, Heero has started to search for his place in the world while figuring out his heart. When he sees her again, however, things begin to change in a way he didn't expect. He wants to know why... if she'll let him.Special Thanks to TheBlackRose, my Fanfiction hero, Mentor, and dear friend, without whom I would have given up writing fanfiction entirely... and for putting up with my overall cheesiness and wacko story ideas!
Relationships: Relena Peacecraft/Heero Yuy
Comments: 16
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [the_black_rose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_black_rose/gifts).



Heero Yuy hated convocations. It was one of the drawbacks of some of his classes he had elected to take that semester. Political science was one that he hadn’t really fancied but given his history he thought it might be interesting to see how the rest of the world viewed the events that had transpired nearly three years ago. He had expected to find the class amusing or boring but instead had found himself genuinely enjoying it. It had been even more interesting, however, when he found that attending certain events would be mandatory to his grade. This particular event had him anxious though. He didn’t like anxiety. 

Relena was coming to give a speech to the student body about making correct choices to prevent repeating the mistakes of the past and shooting for an overall better future. Knowing she would be there twisted his stomach into uncomfortable knots. To his knowledge she had no idea he was there; no idea he was a student and athlete at that University and that he would be in the audience. It was possible but he largely doubted it. Somehow though, amidst the throngs of students excited to hear her speak, she had found him. Somehow, her aqua eyes found his Prussian blue in a sea of those watching her every move. She had paused for only an instant, faltering though only those who knew her would have noticed. The surprise in her gentle gaze warmed him. It was hot and stuffy and the close proximity to his fellow students was less than ideal. Seeing her again however… He studied her up on the stage as he listened to her words.

She looked good. The color of her suit brought out her eyes and her hair shone in the artificial sunlight. She had grown physically: she seemed a bit taller and her figure had filled out in nicely… ‘When did her legs get so long?’ She had certainly seemed to grow into her own. Shoulders back, head high, she conveyed all the confidence one in her position rightly should have and exuded a presence that commanded the attention of all in the room.

He knew Relena had been using her new position as the Foreign Minister to tour the colonies and make notes of necessary changes even as she negotiated and conversed with the powers that be for better living conditions for the residents. 

Countless charities, homeless shelters and assistance programs had been built and established under her care and guidance. If the ESUN did not approve the funds necessary, then she funded it herself and found ways for the programs and shelters to stay funded and managed. In an interview Relena had stated how she hoped to influence the youth of today to work together to rebuild their communities and strive for a better tomorrow. From any other politician those might have been empty words, but not from her. When she spoke, she meant every word she said and it was that earnest nature and honesty that drew people to her. She was a beacon of hope to billions and a symbol of the peace he and the other pilots had fought for. As her speech continued, he noticed how her eyes continued to return to him, a smile reserved just for him danced in their cerulean depths.

When the speech concluded, she thanked the audience and exited the stage to a chorus of applause and ruckus cheers. As if on their own, his feet moved him toward the stage, following her exit. He bumped into a few students, muttered an apology or two as he tangled his way through the crowd. They all had somewhere else they needed to be It was a Friday evening; basketball season had just ended so no practice or game awaited his immediate attention... but he had to… If only for a moment…

‘I need to see her…’ 

He came up behind her; it hadn’t taken him long to follow the secure route taken by her guards to escort her to the car. He caught a glimpse of her as he turned the corner. She had let her hair down out of the bun she had previously worn and now it cascaded like liquid gold down her slender back. He felt his breath catch as he allowed his eyes to follow the silken strands down her form to her hips and her nicely rounded rear on down to her long legs...creamy skin encased delicately in nylon that he suddenly longed to slide off of her…

“Stop where you are!” a guard had seen him, drawn his gun, stood between him and her. This was expected. It was also unacceptable. It would be easy to incapacitate him to get to her but that would leave her without some of her protection.

“Jenkins! It’s alright!” Her voice interrupted his train of thought. He looked over to find her standing behind her guard, hand on his arm.

“Ma’am, stay where you are. This punk has been following us since we left the speech.”

“Lower your weapon, Tony.” Tony opened his mouth to protest, but she visibly gripped his arm a bit tighter. Her lips formed into a soft smile. “It’s okay… He’s an old friend.” The warmth in her voice made his stomach flip. It was an unfamiliar feeling. He didn’t know if he liked it, but he didn't exactly not like it. She stepped out in front of her guard who had holstered his gun but kept his hand over it as a precautionary measure. He was glad to see her security seemed to actually care about her safety. It was quite the improvement from that time she had fallen into the rose garden… 

“Hello, Heero.” The way she said his name made his stomach flip again and he struggled to grab hold of his thoughts. His lips turned up at the corners into the smallest of smiles.

“Relena.”

“We’re on our way to get some dinner. Would you like to come along?”

“Ma’am, with all due respect, he doesn’t have the proper clearance--”

“Lieutenant, do you trust me?” The man paused for a moment and looked from her to Heero and back to her again before nodding. Heero found the guard’s reaction to her amusing.

“I was thinking we’d get some Italian. Do you know any good places nearby?” Heero nodded and walked toward her, opening her door. 

He watched as she gently slid into the seat, his eyes going once more to her legs as he noticed how the subtle slit in the side of her skirt exposed more of her leg… He mentally shook himself as he shut her door and made his way around to the other side. The dirty look her guard shot him did not go unnoticed before he offered the lieutenant a small, smug smile and joined her in the back seat. He told the address to the driver as the Security guard took the passenger seat. He noticed the second car behind them. ‘More guards in tow: Smart.’ 

The ride to the small Italian Bistro was fairly quiet. To anyone who had never been around the young diplomat, she would have seemed perfectly calm, but there was a tenseness he couldn’t ignore. Heero felt it too. It had been two years since he’d been in the same room with her… even longer still since he collapsed in the Presidential bunker. He had fully expected the hard, cold ground to greet him at the end of his fall but found instead, the safety of her arms. She caught him, cradled him to her chest and cooed to him softly as she stroked his wild hair. He remembered her smell: roses and vanilla and the feel of her soft breasts beneath his cheek…

Heero felt his cheeks heat in an uncharacteristic blush and found himself resisting the urge to compare her change in chest size. Yes, time had been good to her figure indeed… Her attention was on a document from one of her various folders but it was clear she couldn’t focus and he soon felt her eyes on him. He wondered what she was thinking; what she thought of him now. He knew he hadn’t changed much. He was a bit taller, his hair still wild if a bit longer than before. He knew his face had thinned down to that of a man’s, something the women at campus seemed to admire though he paid them no attention. Finally, as if realizing he noticed her gaze, her cheeks turned a soft shade of pink and she glanced back down at her papers, fingers trembling ever-so-slightly. 

“Relena…” He hadn’t realized he had said her name until she froze and looked at him, a soft look on her face.

“Heero?” 

“How have you been?” The question seemed to surprise her, but then, his presence seemed to do that already before. She offered a small, pleasant smile and placed the papers in her lap. Folding her hands together on top of them.

“I’ve been well.” She started and he noted the slight bags under her eyes. She didn’t seem to be ill; her skin color was good, eyes bright and clear. She was mostly tired, he noted. “Work keeps me pretty busy but I enjoy it.” He nodded. “And you?” Heero didn’t know why he hadn’t expected her to return his question and he faltered for a moment. He had wanted to see her but hadn’t thought it through at all, let alone to small talk.

“Okay.” His answer was short and he saw disappointment flash in her eyes. He cleared his throat. “I’m a student at the university. I enrolled earlier this year.”

“Oh?” She smiled and her eyes lit up. How was it one expression from her could light up the space around her? “I’m so happy.” This confused him. 

“Why?”

“Why what?” Her brows knit together in mild confusion.

“Why does that make you happy?” She seemed to consider his question for a moment before turning from him to look straight ahead. 

“Because you’re living your life.” She looked down at her hands. “You’re moving on from the war… from your past… Allowing yourself to experience the peaceful world you helped create…” She turned to him again, a sad smile on her face. “You deserve it.” The joy in her eyes hid a sadness he couldn’t quite understand. He wanted to reach out… to touch her… to find out where that sadness came from and maybe...

“Relena…”

The car came to a stop before he could get out his thought. He got out of the car, walked around and was met with a glare from Jenkins as he beat the Lieutenant to open her door. Heero shot back one of his patented glares which seemed to make the other man pause. Relena’s exit from the car broke their brief staredown and he followed her into the restaurant. The smell of garlic and fresh-baked bread greeted their senses as the host greeted them at the door.

“Ah! Signore Heero! buona serata e benvenuto!” 

“È bello vederti, Marco. Do you have an open table for two?” Heero had no idea why but he had felt the sudden desire to impress her. His usage of Italian seemed to do just that as her brows lifted in a look of pleasant surprise.

“For two?” Marco glanced over to Relena and a sly smile crossed his lips under his handlebar mustache. “Ah! Che bellezza!” Marco bowed to them, offering him a knowing look on his way down. “Benvenuta bella signora.” Relena blushed slightly, but kept her professional composure and smiled at him.

“Grazie, buon signore.” Relena answered back and Marco straightened back up, a genuine smile on his face.

“You speak the Italian?” Relena nodded. “Buon!” He turned back to Heero and smiled that same sly smile and a wink. “This way Signore!” Marco led them back to his usual table: a two seater near a small fountain next to a stained-glass window with a view of a small garden. Marco placed two menus, napkins and silverware down for them before pulling out her chair for her.

“Grazi, Marco.” She smiled and sat down, Marco scooting her in before offering a bow.

“Prego, Bella.”

Heero took his own seat and nodded to Marco as the host informed them that their waiter would be by soon. The wink he left Heero with was telling. Her security did not seem at all amused by the lack of available tables near them, but he didn’t care. He was more than capable of protecting her if need be, but Guiseppe's was as safe a place as any. Relatively isolated and small, its clientele were usually a crowd of regulars that minded their own business. 

The waiter arrived and set two glasses of ice water and a set of straws on the table before reaching for the notepad in his apron. He smiled and offered a greeting before taking their order. For Heero, pasta carbonara and the house beer. Relena ordered spaghetti aglio e olio with a white wine. He wasn't surprised by her drink choice; she looked like a wine person. The waiter smiled, complimented them on their excellent choices and made his exit, leaving them to enjoy the soft music of a duet between a mandolin and an accordion. 

A glance at Relena showed her simple joy at the quaint setting. The candle in the middle was lit and cast a soft glow that matched the overall ambiance of the place. Her eyes had softened, her lips turned up in the smallest of smiles as she leaned forward, elbow on the table, chin resting on her hands as she sighed. The candle light seemed to dance on her features and she looked… otherworldly...like...

“I take it you come here regularly?” Heero nodded.

“Guiseppe’s is a good place to study. It’s quiet and the food is good.”

“I can’t wait to try some.” She smiled. He found himself studying the curve of her lips… the soft pink color… “Heero?” 

“Hm?” His attention snapped back to her. Her brows had quiriked up in a curious way. 

“It really is good to see you. I’ve wondered how you’ve been.”

“You have?” She nodded.

“I keep in contact with most of the other pilots. Quatre is managing his father’s business again, Trowa is in the Circus still with his sister. Duo and Hilde eloped last month and are already expecting their first child!” He knew about those two. They had called him at the last minute and had him stand as a witness. There was a wistful look in her eyes… soft and deep… he wondered about it… “Wufei is working with Sally in Preventer as one of their top agents. He seems to be the only one who continues to fight…” She seemed bothered by that thought, but he didn’t know why.

“And you?” He paused and stared at her. 

“What?”

“Are you sure you wouldn’t rather be fighting too?” She looked down at the table, eyes seeming focused on the tiny flame of the candle. He could see that sadness again and fought the confusing urge once more to reach out for her…

“The war is over. I don’t need to fight anymore.” His simple statement seemed to help her. She raised her gaze to him and there was a silent smile in her eyes.

“I’m glad.” He saw something deeper, warmer, swirling in the aqua depths but had no time to figure out what it was before the waiter placed their food in front of them.

“Buon appetito.” He bowed and left them alone once again. They ate in relative, but comfortable silence. She sat with perfect posture, dabbed her mouth between bites before taking a drink, napkin in her lap… she was the perfect lady as only a lifetime of etiquette and manners could create. The helpings they were brought had been more than enough. Heero saw her struggling to even finish half of the portion and smiled. The tiramisu they ordered for dessert seemed to thrill her. The way her eyes closed and the hum of pleasure she emitted at the taste made the hairs on his arm stand on end and his blood heat making him shift slightly at the new tightness in his groin… He took a drink of the cold water in hopes of taking his mind off the way the cream on her lips seemed to call to him before she wiped it away… 

As the final bite of the decadent dessert disappeared between her lips she smiled and it brought one to his own lips. He knew taking her here would be a good idea. He smiled as she sipped her wine once more, her face looking a bit flushed. How long had they been here? It hardly seemed to matter. He was here… with her… and they seemed to be having a good time… He knew she would have to leave soon. She was a busy person… so many people demanded her time… still… he just wanted… needed.... 

“Relena…”

“Yes?” He had her undivided attention, the contented smile still on her face.

“Do you have anything else scheduled for today?” His mouth and throat suddenly felt very dry as he waited for her answer. Her lips tightened at the corners, her brow furrowed again as her facial expression fell.

“Not exactly, no…” Her hands went to her lap where he could tell she began to wring her fingers.

“Not exactly?” Heero pressed. He didn’t know why it was so important, but he had to know… 

“I have a meeting in the morning that I really must prepare for. It is the introduction for a summit to discuss colonial improvements throughout the ESUN.” She paused and looked back up at him, her eyes seemed to plead with him for something… 

“I see.” He felt the disappointment build inside him and looked anywhere but her face.

“Why do you ask?” There was something in her voice...hope? Curiosity? He felt his heart jump. 

“I was…” hoping? Wanting? “Wondering if you would like to spend the rest of the day with me. I could show you around the colony…” He watched her eyes light with surprise for the briefest of moments before they clouded over with that same sadness as before.

“Heero, I-”

“Ma’am, we need to be going,” Jenkins suddenly appeared by the table and Heero felt the urge to pummel him for the interruption.

“I know, Jenkins.”

“Relena…”

“I’m sorry, Heero. Some other time, maybe?” There was something more… something she wasn’t saying… He could see it in her eyes again… sadness, regret...longing? As she stood to go, he stood and reached for her, gently grasping her wrist. Her guards reached for their guns. Heero ignored them.

“Stay.” He locked eyes with her, stormy Prussian blue to swirling aqua. “Please..?” Her eyes darted down to his hand and then back to his eyes. Were those tears? 

“I can’t. I’m sorry.” He let her go and felt a twist in his gut. “I have to go, but it really was nice seeing you again… getting to catch up…” She cleared her throat and shouldered her purse, her eyes suddenly becoming unreadable. Her smile she offered seemed to be no more special than it would be for anyone else. "Please, take care of yourself?” She began to make her way to the door but stopped and turned to face him one more time. There were definitely unshed tears this time, no matter how hard she tried to hide them. “Goodbye, Heero...” 

He felt it was a ‘goodbye’. A _real ‘_ goodbye’. He didn’t want goodbye. He didn’t know what he wanted but he knew ‘goodbye’ wasn’t it. As she made her way out to the car, all he could do was watch as he swore to himself that no matter what he would see her again and find out what exactly it was that she had made him feel…


	2. Questions and Answers?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heero, left unsettled by how things ended at the bistro, decides to try for something... even if he doesn't know exactly what
> 
> Special Thanks to DarkSharinganZ for the advice! Check out his Twitch Channel, Gumtree! And as always to the_black_rose!

Ch. 2

The downtown area of Newport City passed by as he looked aimlessly out the window. His eyes were dry and from his reflection in the window, he could tell he looked exhausted. He hadn't slept well since she'd told him goodbye at the restaurant and hardly at all since their last phone conversation. The confusion and pain he had felt had bothered him so much that he had not been able to put it from his mind. In a moment of absolute weakness, he confided in Duo as much as he dared. His braided friend reluctantly gave him her personal number and wished him luck. He called that evening needing answers… needing to hear her voice say his name… the phone rang once, twice, five times before she answered, her voice soft with an air of exhaustion.

_ "Vice Foreign Minister Dorlan." _

_ "Relena…" _

_ "He-Heero?" He could hear what sounded like her blankets shuffling and he winced as he looked at the clock. _

_ "Yeah." _

_ "How did you get this number?" It was a valid question. He licked his suddenly dry lips as he prepared his answer. _

_ "Duo. I told him I needed to talk to you." A sigh came from the other end. _

_ "At 3 A.M.?" _

_ "Sorry. Forgot the time difference." _

_ "Are you alright?" There was concern in her tone. He hadn't meant to worry her... _

_ "Yeah… I just couldn't sleep." She sighed but in annoyance or relief he could not tell.  _

_ "I'm sorry..." There was a small pause. "You needed to talk to me?"  _

_ "Did you mean it?" _

_ "Mean what?" The confusion was clear and he took a deep breath to help himself focus. _

_ "Back on the colony. You said goodbye. Did you mean it?" _

_ "Of course I did. I was leaving." _

_ "It sounded final… Was it?" He felt his heart jump.into his chest and held his breath as he awaited her answer.  _

_ "Heero, it's three in the morning. I have a meeting at seven." _

_ "Answer my question, Relena… please?" _

_ "Yes, Heero. It was." _

_ "Why?" _

_ "Because it's time for us both to live our lives." _

_ "I don't understand…" _

_ "I wish you all the best, with all my heart…"  _

_ "Relena, please…?" _

_ "Goodbye, Heero." _

He felt his chest constrict at the memory as a shooting pain went from his chest to his gut and back to his heart. That one conversation had been more painful than when he self-destructed wing. She meant it. She didn't want to see him again. She was saying goodbye. His hands clenched into fists so tightly that his nails dug into his palms as her words ran through his mind over and over. In spite of what she had said, there was something in her voice that told a different story. The unshed tears in her eyes had been the strongest evidence that his gut feeling spoke true. She didn't want it to be over. She didn't want to say goodbye… she couldn't…

The taxi halted outside her building and he tossed the cabby his fare and told him to keep the change. He had waited for this for months. School had been the one major issue that kept him from jumping on a shuttle immediately following that phone call. Now, however, he was free to do so. 

Summer vacation had just begun after a grueling round of final exams. He had aced them all and found himself wondering what to do with his summer. It was strange not knowing. As a soldier he had had a clear objective. The path to achieve that objective hadn't always been as obvious but he still was able to follow his instincts. Ironically, the more he tried to act on his emotions the more he realized that sometimes it was the same as acting on instinct. It was this realization that had caused him to take a shuttle to the former Sanq Kingdom to see her again.

Her office was on the tenth floor of the government building: located in the middle of the hall for easy access but could still be well-guarded if necessity dictated it. Heero made his way to the elevator and pressed the button as the bland, classical music droned form speakers overhead. He felt his stomach knot again the way it had the last time he had thought of approaching her. He leaned casually against the metal sides of the elevator and sighed, running a hand through his messy bangs. 

The ding of the doors opening as he reached her floor pulled him from his thoughts. Clearing his throat, he squared his shoulders and stepped out of the elevator to make his way to her office. The carpeted floor had a generic dizzying pattern if you stared at it too long; he found that out the hard way as he reconsidered, briefly, his current objective. He counted the potted plants, ten in all, as he made his way closer. Why was the ceiling suddenly as captivating as the floor? He paced back and forth for a moment or two. How could trying to talk to one woman be more terrifying than facing an army of mobile dolls? Then again, battle was easy. You knew the opponents' objective: kill or be killed. Battle made sense: you fight, destroy the enemy suit and win. This however? This was something he had never been prepared for. 

“Just do it.” He growled quietly to himself before finally opening her office door and making his way inside. The receptionist at the desk stared at him as he came in. She was a small woman, mousy and middle-aged with her hair pulled into a tight bun and her glasses on the tip of her nose. She seemed irritated to be interrupted from whatever task she had been assigned and all but glared at him from over her glasses. 

“Can I help you sir?” He noticed her sizing him up, taking in his overall appearance as a matter of judging his character rather than physical attributes. Her scrutiny irritated him as much as it did made him uneasy. 

“I'm here to see Relena.” The woman narrowed her eyes, paused and took off her glasses, folding them neatly and pacing her hands over them. Nose in the air, she offered him a fake smile. 

“I'm sorry, sir, but the _Vice_ _Foreign_ _Minister_ is in a phone conference right now. You'll have to come back later.” So, that was it. She didn’t like his familiarity with Relena. Heero found he couldn’t care less and pressed again.

“I need to see her.”

“I can appreciate that, but she is very busy today and cannot be disturbed. You will have to wait.”

“When will she be free?” Irritation was a particular emotion he did not enjoy and yet, the more he dealt with certain kinds of people the more he found he encountered it. This woman was extremely irritating. She stood between him and Relena; unacceptable.

“She has no time slots open.”

“What about lunch?” 

“She took an early lunch for a conference right before you arrived.” Heero swore under his breath, a fact that did not seem to escape the shrew’s notice.

“And there are no other times?” The woman smiled, more of a sneer of satisfaction and Heero wondered what it was about him that had raised her ire so.

“I'm sorry but she is booked solid all day.” She smiled again and Heero used every ounce of self control he had not to put the woman in her place. He took in a breath and offered her his own, tight-lipped smile.

“That's fine then. I'll wait until she's done.” The woman only nodded. Heero realized he had glared at her; a habit he never fully kicked but it seemed to have put her off of her high-horse. He genuinely smirked.

“Of course” 

He took a seat by the door, crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back in the chair. He had plenty of time to look at her office lobby. It was small with the desk, metal filing cabinet, and three chairs for people to wait in. The color scheme could not possibly have been Relena’s choice: greys and deep blues that did nothing to draw the eye. Two potted plants sat at even intervals on either side of the chairs and side tables as well containing magazines and puzzle books. None of them seemed to be used which told him foot traffic from anyone outside the building was rare. By his reckoning, Relena’s work day would end at around six. The shrew would know, but Heero did not believe she would be very helpful. It didn't matter; he could wait. Leaning back and closing his eyes. He focused on the ticking of the wall clock and the clacking of the secretary’s keyboard… and then her door...

His eyes snapped open and he sat up straight to be greeted by the sight of Relena’s slender form. Had he actually fallen asleep? He sat up straighter and took a moment to get a good look at her. The pastel pink of her skirt gave her the soft, gentle, look that would cause most people to underestimate her. Her matching blazer was slung over one arm and her purse over her opposite shoulder and a matching bag that most likely contained her work hung from her other hand. His eyes involuntarily noticed the way the fabric moved with her curves... He stood up; his gaze met hers and found her eyes wide, clearly surprised to see him.

"Heero?"

"Relena." He tried to offer her a smile but the hesitation he saw in her eyes gave him pause.

"I didn't expect to see you." He felt his mouth dry out when he tried to respond.

"I know."

"What brings you here?" Her voice was steady and controlled. Her eyes, though kind, were unreadable.

"I had to talk to you."

"You could have called."

"Not about this." She raised a brow slightly.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want goodbye, Relena" Her eyes widened, eyebrows shooting up in sheer surprise before she seemed to collect herself.

"What?"

"You said goodbye; that we both needed to live our lives… but I can't…" She shifted her purse on her shoulder. Clearly he had made her uncomfortable.

"Heero…" 

"Seeing you again… something happened…"

"Don't..."

"I can't say goodbye, Relena." 

"Heero…please…" She paused and turned away from him, wrapping her arms around herself. He felt his chest tighten in the small period of time where he waited for her response. There was almost a pained desperation in her voice, soft and nearly undetectable. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment before continuing. He could swear he saw her tremble…? "You are an amazing person, and you have done so much... for everyone… but you need to live a normal, happy life."

"What are you saying?"

"I want you to leave Heero." His whole body froze as pain seared it's way through every nerve ending until it reached his heart. It took him a moment to gather his thoughts, take a breath...

"Relena-"

"I don't want you to contact me again." Her tone of voice was cold and unfamiliar. 

His mind swam. This wasn't what he had been expecting… He didn't know what he had been expecting but this wasn't it. The knot in his stomach formed again, tighter than ever as confusion overtook his consciousness. Things went so well on the colony… the dinner… she seemed so relaxed with him… so happy… it didn't make any sense.

"I don't understand… Did I do something wrong?" Her eyes widened briefly before her brows knit and her lips pursed slightly, the corners of her mouth turned down. 

"No, it isn't that at all."

"Then what is it? Tell me." 

"I already have." She turned away from him. "Please… just go…?"

"Relena…"

"I'm sorry, Heero." The final dismissal. The final barb. He couldn't look at her. The lump that formed in his throat nearly prevented his reply.

"So am I." He walked to the door and didn't look back. "Goodbye, Relena." He let the door close behind him and made his way down the stairs. He didn’t want to wait for the elevator...


	3. Reunited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A special visitor shows up at the Halloween party. How will Heero handle it? How will she?

Ch. 3 Reunion

* * *

Heero glanced down at the black cotton and leather ensemble on the hanger. Duo had insisted he come to their party to unwind from the end of midterms and relax before basketball season started. It hadn't seemed like a bad idea until Duo insisted he wear a Halloween costume. One that Duo had “selected” for him. The party was to be held at Duo’s House, expanding from the yard into the house. Heero had foolishly invited Duo and Hilde out to eat dinner with his teammates… or rather, the braided man inserted himself into the celebratory dinner with smooth talk and skill. It didn’t take long for the former polit of 02 to become friends with most of the team and so the guest list for the party included most of the team and a few of their friends and significant others. 

Duo’s two-bedroom, one-story house was barely big enough to accommodate everyone so Duo expanded the festivities into his backyard. The one place that remained off limits, however, was the scrap shop: a large metallic shed the size of a small airplane hanger and Duo and Hilde's main place of business. It also served as Heero’s own personal haven that he more than intended to make use of when the festivities became inevitably too much for him. Heero knew no matter how many times he socialized, or how many people he met he would never be a “people person”. So, When Do asked him to join them at the party, Heero had been less than enthused.

_"What is this?"_

_"It's your costume for the party. I knew you'd never pick one out yourself."_

_"I'm not going."_

_"Come on, Heero! You're a superstar! You have to be there!"_

_"No."_

_"You're gonna let your teammates down,” Duo grinned. “Not to mention disappoint your fanclub!" Heero rolled his eyes. The throngs of female admirers were an annoyance. "What am I gonna do when all those lovely ladies clamoring for a piece of the star ball player start pouting cause you're not there?"_

_"You'll manage." Duo put on his best pouty face, a thing to which Heero was completely immune._

_"Come on, Pally, It's a Halloween party! You need to come and have some fun!"_

_"I-"_

_"You've worked your ass off all semester! You owe it to yourself to kick back for once! What do ya say?" Heero mulled his friend's words over. It had been a stressful few months. Summer baseball season had ended but classes from his double major were taking a lot out of him and with basketball season coming up… He sighed and nodded in defeat._

_"Alright! I knew you'd give in!" Duo slapped him on the back. "Now, here." Duo thrust the hanger at him. "No need to thank me. Just try it on!"_

In spite of his own objections, Heero humored his friend and they made the purchase without another word. The blousey fabric chosen for his costume chafed and the leather of the pants and vest was far tighter than he felt they needed to be. The long leather coat and knee-high boots finished the ensemble which Heero thought was a bit over the top. To add insult to injury, the outfit came with something called "guy-liner" for his eyes. 

'No.' Heero left that particular item in the bag. He found it humiliating enough looking like an emo Captain Hook.

He wondered, again, how he had allowed himself to be talked into going to Duo's Halloween gathering but he figured it would be another step in understanding this part of his new life. 

_"Act on your emotions…"_

Odin's advice still haunted him after all these years. Doctor J had done his level best to train all emotions out of him and transform him into the perfect soldier: logical and calculated. Emotions clouded the mind and impaired judgement. Emotions were a hindrance to mission objectives and caused people to behave irrationally. But, he was no longer a soldier. There were no more missions to be completed. In this peaceful world, he could finally try to follow his former mentor's words. Although, his last attempt to act on his emotions left him feeling hopeless. He could still hear her words in his mind…

_“It’s time we both lived our lives…”_

_Relena..._

_“I don't want you to contact me again…”_

"Argh, matey!" Duo slapped his arm around Heero's shoulders. Heero groaned inwardly. "Geeze, you could smile! This is a party you know?" The acrid smell of hops and alcohol coming from the braided man told Heero his friend was already “loose”. 

The former Deathscythe pilot breathed into Heero’s personal space. ‘No, not loose. Completely gone.’

Heero shrugged off Duo's arm and side-stepped him to get some space. The costume was already hot and uncomfortable. Duo seemed not to mind. Dressed as what Heero could only guess was some sort of Frankenstein's monster - except his skin was painted grey instead of a characteristic green - he wore a stuffy-looking, tailored suit.

"You like my costume? Hilde and I are a matching couple! It's from an old show from way before the war. I think it's called The Munsters?" He laughed but Heero failed to see what was funny.

"You're drunk." Heero stated. Duo waved him off.

"Nah! Just loosened up a bit!" Heero took a sip of his own beer. If the start of the party was any indication of how the rest would go, Heero felt the beer would be the first of many. He didn't know everyone at the party, but his time at school had helped him acclimate a bit better to social environments. 

"So, have you seen her yet?" 

"Who?"

"Who do you think?" Heero stared at the braided man which caused his friend to roll his eyes dramatically. "Relena." 

Heero felt his stomach knot and his chest tighten at the mention of her name. The idiot had not mentioned she'd be there. He felt the blood drain from his face and cleared his throat before taking a larger than usual swig of his beer. 

"No." He answered sharply, eyes on his drink.

"Huh?" Duo leaned forward and stared at him; Heero wondered if the fool was too drunk to see straight. "Come on, Heero. You can't still be upset? That was months ago!" Heero knew how long ago it had been. The memory of how she dismissed him that day was burned into his mind. 

Nearly five months had passed since their last encounter. He had tried his hardest not to think of her or what had transpired during that time, but he kept hearing her call his name in his dreams… the sorrow in her voice as he left the office and didn’t look back… Or he tried not to. The more he replayed the events in his mind, the more he began to notice tiny things. The way she looked that day was burned into his consciousness so vividly he could still see the fluorescent lighting in her golden hair… the bags under her eyes, slight but noticeable spoke of hours of hard work and the way her shoulders had slumped during their conversation told him she had been truly exhausted. This did not excuse her rejection, but it did make him wonder...

_"I don’t want you to contact me again…"_

He winced as her words came slamming back to him a second time. The knot in his stomach returned to twist him up inside. He had said goodbye; walked out of her office without another word, and yet the idea of her not wanting him in her life still hurt...

“Man. You gotta get over it. I've talked to her, Heero." He stared at his beer. She had made it very clear where he stood with her. He took a drink.

"I'll pass."

"Come on, Heero. Trust me. You need to try again.” Duo’s violet eyes shone with compassionate understanding. “Talk to her. Hilde will never forgive me if you don't!” Duo left him to go mingle with his other guests. 

Heero finished his beer and fetched another from the cooler before letting his eyes roam across the room. Her security was certainly here, guarding every possible entrance. Jenkins stood by the front door, his arms folded over his chest and wearing a pair of dark sunglasses. Heero couldn't help but scoff. 

He was saved the effort of a search for her as a soft, familiar voice came from behind him: “Hello, Heero.” 

He turned to look at her and his breath hitched in his throat. The cut of the blouse she wore was off the shoulders with a low neckline; still modest enough that it covered everything, but allowed the eyes a tantalizing glimpse of her round breasts which were partially bound by a black leather-looking corset. The skirt she wore ended about mid-thigh, and did nothing to hide her long, slender legs above the knee-high leather boots that matched the corset. Around her forehead was an all-black handkerchief knotted at the side to complete the pirate ensemble. She seemed a bit uncomfortable to be wearing such a thing and yet it made her look… 

“It’s good to see you.” Her words brought him out of his trance. She was blushing. Had she seen him looking…? “How have you been?” That question was enough to return him to reality as their last meeting came back to him all too clearly.

“Ok.” His tone was a bit cold, but felt appropriate to him. 

“How is your semester going?” Her voice was soft and a bit shaky, as if she were unsure she should even ask.

“Ok.” She nodded, not looking at him. 

“Are you enjoying the party?” Another question with a meek tone? This was strange for her. Even at her shyest, Relena had shown more spirit than this. Still, he really had nothing to say to her… He shrugged and took a drink of his beer. There was an awkward silence that followed. Finally, he heard her shift toward him.

“Heero… about what happened…”

“Forget it.”

“I can't.” 

“I have.” He took another drink and started to walk away, but something in her voice pulled at him.

“Heero, please…” She reached out and grabbed his sleeve with a feather-light grip. “I haven't.” Something made him look at her. The tilt of her head, the defeat in her voice, it made his heart twist. “Not a day has gone by where I haven't regretted... what I said.”

He considered her words for a moment. She was sincere. He knew that. Relena never said anything she didn’t mean, least of all something as important as that. He turned towards her and her eyes met his. The amount of emotions swirling in their stormy aqua depths staggered him: confusion, regret, anguish... longing. 

“I'm sorry, Heero. You came all that way to see me, and I was so cold toward you. You didn't deserve it…” The amount of sorrow in her words hit him hard and sent a shot of pain through his heart. 

“I'm sorry, too.” Her brows raised and her eyes widened in surprise. 

“I showed up, unwanted…" 

She winced and he felt guilt punch him in the gut. “You have never been unwanted...”

“That's not the impression I got."

"I know. I'm so sorry…"

"Why did you come over here?" 

"To make things right…" She took a shaky breath. "I never meant to hurt you…" 

Heero felt the knot in his stomach loosen slightly… "Then...What did you mean? It’s not like there was ambiguity in what you said, Relena.”

"I-" She paused, closed her mouth, opened it again, then bowed her head. "It's complicated." 

"Relena…" He walked in front of her. He needed answers; deserved them. "You showed up at my university. Agreed to spend some small amount of time together - then told me goodbye, and that we both need to live our lives.”

Relena stared in the direction of his shoulder. Her eyes glassy.

“When I didn’t like that answer and came to speak to you - traveled all the way to Earth I had to wait in your lobby for hours to even get the privilege to speak to you. And for my efforts, I’m told to leave and never contact you again.”

“Heero, I—“

“Skip ahead five months… Five months without a word, and you just walk up to me and try to make small talk?" He felt his mouth dry out as his blood rushed through his veins. "Why?"

"Heero…” She paused and took a breath. “I-I don’t think now is the time to talk about it.” 

He looked around. She was right. They had already attracted a small audience. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Come with me." 

He led her through the kitchen to the back door and out to the scrap shop past the cheap lawn decorations and party guests. Thr few people that had snuck out to the back were mostly too preoccupied with each other or too drunk to notice them. As they reached the door, he pulled a key from under the doormat and ushered her in. It was a large building of tin siding with a steel frame that clearly had been purchased as an empty storage space. There was white-washed drywall that made up the walls of the office in a small portion of the front. 

The whole space smelled of oil and old paperwork and there were boxes and piles of scrap of various metallic materials mostly organized, laying around. He debated, for a moment, showing her his loft that existed above the office space form long before Duo had moved in. It would have been a more private place, the area by the office would be more than they needed. The music from the party could still be heard; it pierced the awkward silence.

"Now, explain." He wasn't asking. He needed to know… had to know...

“I don't know how.” Her voice was soft, her eyes suddenly focused on the floor.

“Try.”

Again, she grew silent and seemed to focus anywhere but him. 

“Relena?” He moved directly in front of her and stood his ground. “Do you really want me out of your life?”

“That… wasn’t what I meant. Even though… when you came to visit—”

“You told me not to contact you again. I’d say that’s as close to telling me to get out of your life as you can get.” 

Her posture changed again, her shoulders hunching slightly. “I know.”

"Now you say it’s not what you meant. I don’t understand.”

“I’m sorry.” 

He reached out and gently took hold of her shoulders. “Tell me what’s going on, Relena.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, it does.” He lifted her chin to get her to look at him. After a moment, her eyes met his. “It does to me. There’s a lot...I’m struggling with. Things I don’t know or fully understand. But, if there’s one thing that your visit made clear… I know being out of your life isn’t what I want.”

“Heero…”

“Do you…" he grabbed her hand, "want me out of your life?” 

She paused and Heero felt his heart freeze in his chest as he waited for her answer...

“No.” 

Relief washed over him like a tidal wave as the knot in his stomach loosed and he released a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding.

“Then why did you tell me-?”

“Because you deserve better!” The sorrow in the tone of her voice made his gut twist again. His anger and resentment disappeared to be replaced by the confusing urge to hold her...

“Better?” 

Relena nodded her head slowly, unable to meet his eyes. If he had been confused before, he was more so, now. He was the soldier: bloodstained and common. She had been a princess and a queen. Better? It made no sense...

“Relena...?”

“Do you remember what I said at the bistro? That you deserve to enjoy this time of peace?” 

He nodded, still a bit confused. “What does that have to do with anything?”

Her mouth twisted and turned down. “Nothing. Forget I said anything.” Her lips were tight in a tense smile, her eyes downcast. She was embarrassed… 

“No.”

“Heero please… I should be going anyway. I have an… an early meeting tomorrow…” 

She was brushing him off again; trying to avoid the subject, but he wouldn’t let her. He couldn’t. He was so close to getting answers - answers he needed. "Just believe me when I say that I am truly sorry."

“Relena,” He gently lifted her chin again. “Why are you pushing me away?” 

She sighed and closed her eyes and Heero resisted the urge to pull her close to him.

“I never wanted to push you away..." She paused and took a breath. "It's just so silly, now that I actually stop to think about it... and sort of foolish of me, I suppose, but…” She shifted back a step and crossed her arms over her chest - as if to protect herself. “The way you behaved that day… when we had dinner on the colony… your voice… the way you asked me to stay… I thought that maybe you… that it was possible you felt... which is silly because we've never even really-” 

“Never really what?” He closed the distance between them, taking her hand in his. This time, something was different. This time, the contact sent a shock up his arm to his spine and into his heart. A brief gasp indicated she might have felt it, too. She pulled away, lifting her head to look at him, a sad smile on her face.

“There’s never been anything between us…" her eyes met his... "has there?” 

He stepped toward her again, unsure how to answer her question. He reached up and pushed a stray strand of hair from her face, the back of his fingers caressing her cheek as he did so.

“I mean, we danced the one time when I cornered you and we eventually became...allies during the war? And certainly, you’ve saved my life - on more than one occasion.”

Heero frowned. Dance? Allies? 

“And...and at one point, you promised to protect me. But...it was because we were… friends…? I suppose that would be the closest description… although there was that moment on the abandoned colony where you… where we..." She paused again, this time her cheeks were heated with the slightest blush. It took a moment before her meaning came to him: their first, unexpected kiss. It had been after they had managed to stop Sogran and the remnants of White Fang from capturing their Gundams. 

She was leaving to tell the council that she and Quatre were still alive. As she told him goodbye, he had stopped her; grabbed her wrist and pulled her in for a kiss. The contact had been so brief; their lips barely brushing before a mechanical whine alerted them - they had to keep moving! They had a narrow window of time to escape - before the abandoned colony exploded. 

He began to see why she, too, was confused. He hadn't even known why he'd chanced it, except that her concern for his safety… the fact that she cared… He hadn't exactly attempted to make that kiss into something more… He didn't even see her again until he’d destroyed the Presidential bunker and had collapsed in her arms… and then he disappeared again… 

“Relena…” Her eyes locked with his. Finally. “I don’t know what you’re asking me. But, I do know that, allies and friends… Isn’t quite. Right.” He watched something, some emotion he didn’t understand flash across her face.

“I want to find out...find a name for...these strange feelings.”

Her eyes widened. “Heero…” 

He closed the final distance between them. He leaned forward and down, his lips touching hers tentatively in the softest of caresses. A jolt hit him and surged through his whole body. He liked the way it felt… the way her lips fit against his...She stared for a moment, then closed her eyes as she seemed to relax into the kiss. 

It didn’t last long. She pulled back, releasing a soft sob.

“Relena…?” 

A single tear slid down her cheek as she looked up at him and took a step back.

“We can't. This can't… happen…” she took another step away from him.

“Relena-” He reached for her as she continued her retreat. He felt his heart leap into his chest as panic began to seize him.

“No.” She shook her head. “Heero.”

“Why not?”

“Because you deserve a normal life!” She paused and looked down at the ground, “and you'll never have that with me.” The last part came out in a pained whisper. It shattered the warm feelings that had settled in his chest.

“I’m a former Gundam pilot. Do you really think I have a prayer at living whatever ‘a normal life’ is supposed to be?” 

"Well… I had hoped… that in this time of peace you could find something more… like a career… a family… with someone you wouldn't always worry about having to… protect…"

She still refused to look at him. He had to get through to her. He had the beginnings of an answer to the questions that had kept him up at night - since that day... Now he needed her to realize… Hoped he could get her to see...

“Relena.” He reached out and took her hand, “There’s still a lot I don’t know or understand.... But, I know that when I'm with you, you make me feel, want... More than I am… and I need that… I need you.”

“Heero…”

“Don't run away...” He gently touched her cheek. 

A sudden soft bout of feminine laughter surprised him as he studied her. She looked up at him, eyes light even as a final tear slid down her cheek.

“It's funny.” She started, “not that long ago, I thought the same thing about you… wanted you to not run away from me. Now when I should want you to, I can't… maybe I never could…” 

He leaned forward and kissed her again, this time the jolt he’d felt turned into a fire that seared into his consciousness and flowed through every fiber of his being. She must have felt it too because her arms wrapped around his neck and she deepened the kiss. It wasn’t passionate or heated, but he felt a deeper connection form through that innocent, intimate contact. This had certainly changed things… but in what way…?

“Relena…I-” He breathed and rested his forehead against hers. For some reason he needed her to understand all that he was feeling but couldn’t find a way to say it. “I don’t know what this means...” He looked down at her and found her aqua eyes to be swirling with affection. 

“I-I don’t, either. But…maybe we don’t have to know… not yet anyway…?” 

He nodded and she leaned forward, resting her head against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her to pull her closer.

“I want to try… to find out.” 

She nodded against him, her arms tightening around him as well.

“I suppose we could try to make this work… whatever this is.” 

He hummed his affirmative. 

“You have three years of college left… and we can see each other...Between semesters. Holidays, vacations. Anytime I'm here for work.” 

He kissed the top of her head. He suddenly couldn’t get enough of her. She felt good in his arms. 

“And we can get to know each other.” After a long moment, she pulled back and he looked down at her. “But no promises… no commitments… just… see where it goes…?” 

The corners of his mouth turned up into a small smile. “Okay.” 

The smile she gave him in response warmed his whole body and made his stomach flip. It was strange and unfamiliar, but not unwelcome. He kissed her again, his lips grazing hers. Now that he had truly kissed her, he knew it was a feeling he wouldn’t tire of anytime soon. 

They pulled apart and made their way back to the party hand in hand. He was very aware of her eyes on him. Her gaze ran up his form slowly, almost appreciatively. He couldn’t help the smirk that formed until she started to giggle. He raised a brow at her.

“So... you’re a pirate, too?” 

“You’re just now noticing?”

“Well, it wasn’t really the first thing on my mind when I approached you.” She smiled. “I just didn’t picture you as the costume type, let alone a pirate.” 

He grunted and frowned. “Duo picked it out.” He stated flatly. This triggered a full-blown fit of laughter from her and Heero wondered if maybe she had been indulging in the alcoholic beverages more than he originally thought. “What’s so funny?”

“Hilde picked out mine. She knew I wouldn’t have time and volunteered to do it… now I can see why.”

“Okay?” He was still confused. She leaned into him.

“We look like a matching pair.” Her voice sounded light, almost...teasing? “A pirate couple.”

Heero paused at that thought. A matching pair? Their costumes were the same colors and style. It would make sense. The more he thought of her words, however, the more he began to realize he liked the idea. Perhaps it was the beer, or Duo's cheesy nature rubbing off on him, but he smiled down at her and wrapped one arm around her to pull her closer.


	4. Preparations are a Must

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the help of his braided friend, Heero is faced with an unrealized dilemma around Mid-Terms...

Ch. 4

* * *

"So what are you doing for the one year?" Duo leaned over his desk; his long braid dangling in front of his computer screen. Heero raised a brow as he looked up at his friend. 

"One year what?" Heero nearly growled at him. “I have midterms and you're not helping me focus.” He knocked the braid out of his way, only for the infernal thing to swing back in front of his computer. “There’s a door with your name on it.”

"You're kidding me!" Duo stared at him and Heero felt his annoyance rise. The former Deathscythe pilot was the closest thing he had to a true friend, but sometimes it was hard to resist the urge to throttle him. 

"What?"

"Right. I forgot who I was talking to." Duo ran a hand through his bangs and stood up - taking his stupid braid with him. Finally. He looked over the exam outline and tried to find where he had stopped…

"Your one year anniversary of dating Relena." 

Heero froze. Dating her? When they worked out whatever it was... they had agreed not to put a ‘label’ on it. No commitments, she had said. 

"We're not dating." He stated and turned his attention back to the exam outline. He thought political science would be interesting, but quickly found that there was a particular “point of view” he had to be able to regurgitate in his answers. It was irritating to say the least.

"Huh?" Duo leaned in closer. "Of course you are! I mean, you guys have been romantically involved with each other for nearly a year!"

Yes, they were romantically involved. Kisses stolen in their brief encounters, hugs and handholding whenever no one was around who would care… And that one...heated time on the beach… He mentally shook himself. He couldn't think about that… 

"So, let me ask you this, Mr. 'We're not dating'," Duo said with a smirk. "Do you have any other ladies you’re sneaking around with?"

Heero growled. "No!"

"Ok, ok. I wasn’t… I’m just trying to help you sort this out.” Duo waved his hands, palms out. Then one went up to scratch at the back of his head. “Has she shown interest in other men?" 

Heero felt as though someone kicked him in the gut. Could she be interested in someone else? "Not…” Heero said with a frown, “that I know of."

"Do you want to see other people?"

"No."

"Do you want  _ her _ to?" 

There was that kick again… Did he...Would he give her up to someone else? "No. I..." He glanced up and met Duo’s gaze. For once, the jerk wasn’t looking like he told a joke at Heero’s expense. He shook his head.

"Does the thought of her being with someone else bother you?" 

Bother him? He hated seeing the way other men  _ looked _ at her let alone- "Of course it does."

"Then, what's keepin' ya from making it official?" 

"She is."

"What?" The look of surprise on Duo's face both annoyed and amused him.

"No commitments… See where it goes… That's what she said."

"Did you ask her why?"

"No."

"You should, because it seems to me that what you want is to be official and I'll bet my braid she does too." Duo took the miniature foam basketball on the bed and tossed it through the small hoop hanging on the door. "Well, I gotta go pick up some groceries for Hilde! I thought the cravings were supposed to stop once the baby came."

"Are you sure she's not pregnant again?" Heero quipped and a small grin curved on his lips as his friend's face paled.

"Shit! I hope not!" Duo grabbed his jacket and opened the door. "Don't forget what I told ya. Find out where you stand! Oh, and bring her a gift!"

"For one year of not dating?"

"Just trust me." Duo winked and then paused. He reached into his pocket, pulled out a small box and grinned like a Cheshire cat. "Oh, here ya go, pally. My gift to you." He tossed them at Heero from the doorway. The former Wing Zero pilot looked down at the small box and read its contents to himself: large latex condoms.

"What are these for?"

"Well, Heero, when two people love each other very much and they don't want any-"

"I know what they're for, but why are you giving them to me?"

"Seriously?" He put his hand on the back of his head. "Tell me you were thinking about it?" Duo stared, eyes wide. Heero found himself glancing down. Of course he'd thought about it… he just wasn't sure...what she wanted. "Huh? Come on, Heero. It's been a year. Don't you think you both oughta' indulge? Or have you already and you just ain't sayin'?" 

"None of your business." Heero tossed him the box. "Thanks, but I'll buy my own." 

"Geeze, too proud to take my help huh?" Duo said with a laugh.

"It's not that." It was his turn to grin. "They're not big enough." 

"What?!" Duo's face fell. Heero got a good laugh from it, listening to his braided friend mumbling on the way out about Evil Knievel, a princess and something about a larger sausage …? He chuckled. He never used to chuckle. He never felt much of anything until he met her and now...

Heero put down his mechanical pencil and ran a hand through his bangs. How could he tell her? What would it really change? As Duo pointed out, they already acted like a couple. Why was a label so important? They had an agreement and it had been working well...for the most part. The hardest part of their arrangement was something so simple and yet so new to him: missing her. 

"Damn it." He ran a frustrated hand through his hair and sighed.

Heero Yuy had never missed anyone in his life. Missing someone required emotional attachments which were things he had avoided rather well from years of training and the practice of looking out for himself. Even when Odin had abandoned him, Heero had felt rather indifferent beyond the initial shock of 'what do I do now?'. 

He originally supposed one might miss friends and family but he had no family and the closest thing he had to a friend as Duo. But the former Deathscythe pilot was never absent enough to be missed. No. Missing someone was new to him and she was the reason for it. Their last vid-phone conversation had been longer than usual (on a secured line, as always). He never tired of seeing her face appear on his vid-screen and tried to memorize everything about her each time. 

Their relationship was comfortable and strange and exciting… But also terrifying and new. The things she made him feel just by saying his name…

So much had changed. During the last year, Heero learned things about Relena, and himself, that it never occurred to him to think about. Relena's favorite food was Chinese takeout from a small place about thirty minutes from her house. His favorite was definitely Greek. 

Her favorite color was sky blue and his was blue-green; the color of her eyes. Her favorite season was fall but her favorite holiday was Christmas. He found himself partial to Spring… 

'When I met her…' He smiled. His life changed forever that day… 

She made him think about these things… To try and get to know each other better… It brought them closer. It had been a year of new discoveries; new experiences with her and he loved every one… And he wished they didn't have to hide it.

To afford him as much normalcy as possible they had decided to keep their relationship (such as it was) confidential. Relena hated the idea of the press looking into him and disturbing his casual college experience. They found a way, although it wasn’t exactly what he would prefer. Relena had insisted they try to keep things hidden to protect him from the prying eyes of the public. When they were together in the open she donned a disguise. 

_ "What do you think?" Relena posed for him in front of a 360° mirror. Her honey blonde hair had been tucked under an Auburn wig. Green contacts covered her blue-green eyes to further her change in appearance. He appreciated the way the bluejeans hugged her hips and the t-shirt hung over her chest… _

_ "It's... different. " He answered and crossed his arms over his chest. She frowned, lips turning down into a pout.  _

_ "Different good or different bad?" He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her.  _

_ "It doesn't matter. You're you. That's enough." She smiled and turned to place a gentle kiss on his lips... _

In truth, he didn't care for the red hair and green contacts but it allowed her to have an iota of the freedom she wished for him so he tolerated it. The wig and makeup did nothing to dull her true beauty…If it made her happy, then he would do it, and what made her happy was doing what she could to protect his ‘normal life’ from the craziness of her own.

Only their friends and her family (with the exception of her mother) were aware of their change and all were just as thrilled to hear that they were giving whatever they had a chance. Relena wanted to wait to tell Mrs. Darlian until after they knew something; anything for sure. However, keeping their secret meant making small adjustments. He decided to remodel the loft over the scrap shop into an apartment. He'd used it once as a makeshift safehouse, but now it would serve a better, more permanent purpose.

She had been cross at first. She hadn't wanted him to make any changes for her sake, but Heero, not being a people person, had needed a place to get away from the hassle of the student body anyway. The fact that the loft could offer privacy for her visits was an added bonus. The full-size daybed served as a couch when company was over. There was a simple dark green throw rug on the floor, a small bathroom and a kitchenette area with a microwave, mini fridge and hotplate. The pots and pans, as well as the dinnerware and flatware were kept in a kitchen hutch he'd found and restored. There was a single television with an antenna and a disc player for watching movies if they chose to do so. All in all, it was a small, functional space. It served its purpose.

Of course, she had only been there a few times. He had told her of his loft around Christmas time when he'd gone to see her for the holidays. Christmas had been rather casual. She had to attend various parties, balls and galas celebrating the season, and the war that had ended on Christmas Eve. She had lamented not being able to take him as her date. The gala invitations always included a 'plus one' option, but she never took advantage of it.

_ "I can't do that to you." She said as they cuddled on the couch of her sitting room. "You'd never have a moment's peace if you're seen with me." The sadness in her voice as she buried her face into his shirt caused his chest to tighten.  _

_ "I understand." He kissed the top of her head. She was trying, in her own way, to protect him, but he could tell… He could see how miserable it made her. She looked up at him, her eyes a bit watery. _

_ "At least you're here for Christmas… with me…" He nodded. _

_ "That reminds me…" He pulled away from her and stood up. _

_ "Heero?" He picked up the box that looked large enough to fit a basketball in; the metallic blue wrapping paper catching the light of the fireplace. She smiled as he approached and held it out to her before rejoining her on the couch. _

_ "Merry Christmas, Relena." She opened the wrapping slowly as if not wanting to tear the paper. Finally, the tan box became visible. She pulled out the teddy bear and her lips spread into a beautiful smile. A beautiful patchwork quilt teddy bear of green corduroy and red suede complete with a red velvet bow came into view. _

_ "Heero! I love it!" She hugged it close. "I'll call it...Noel!" She leaned forward and kissed his cheek. "Thank you." The earlier, tense conversation was quickly forgotten amidst eggnog, cookies, and kisses... _

She had gifted him the small basketball hoop on the back of his door stating how she hadn't known what else to get him. Heero liked it. The miniature-sized activity gave him something to do between homework assignments… 

The worst part of their current arrangement was the distance. Sometimes his schedule kept him so busy he barely had time to think about food, let alone how much he missed her. However, on the nights where he did have time, his mind would wander to the last kiss they shared… How cold his arms felt without her in them… It was such a strange thing for him to feel. When she was with him he felt…Different. Normal. Like something that was missing had returned. They always tried to make every moment count.

He groaned. As much as he hated to admit it, Duo was right. He  _ did _ want something more. With it being a special night, Relena had taken the time off to visit him. People didn't just do that for days that held no significance, did they? He thought of Duo's suggestion of bringing a gift… Damned idiot was probably right about that, too. Heero closed his laptop and shuffled some papers into a folder; he grabbed his jacket and walked out.

Gift giving was something he knew he'd never be good at. Christmas, Valentine's Day, her birthday… So many days where gifts were a requirement and yet he never knew what to select. He had never heard of a dating anniversary? If Duo hadn't said anything, then he doubted he would have. In doing some research, Heero discovered that jewelry was usually reserved for spouses and significant others. Since she seemed to like her stuffed bear he had once given her, he found that to be a safe option. But what could he… should he buy… for this sort of thing? 

Relena was no ordinary woman. If not for Relena, he would have died long ago; washed up on the beach… 

Their beach. 

_ They walked their beach, arm in arm, her head on his shoulder... wet sand beneath their bare feet…  _

_ He leaned down and captured her lips, folding her into his arms. She felt so soft… fit so perfectly against him…  _

He still had two weeks to get something. Something that would be just right. He smiled and picked up his phone to dial a familiar number.

"Duo, I need a favor…"


	5. Commitments and Labels

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one-year has finally arrive and Heero has all sorts of plans, but none more important than the ones for their hearts...
> 
> "We don't have to be apart, Relena. I can understand wanting to keep it a secret. If that's what you want, then we'll do it… just...please… give this… us… a chance." He caressed her cheek.

Ch. 5

Heero all but ran from his final class of the day. He had to get to the spaceport to pick her up. It had been three months since their last encounter - shortly after baseball season ended, he took off for Sanq to spend what remained of the summer with her. 

_ They walked their beach, arm in arm, her head on his shoulder... wet sand beneath their bare feet…  _

_ "I can't believe the week has gone by so quickly." Her soft voice broke the steady peace of the waves lapping at the shore. He paused and turned to her. _

_ "I know." He pulled her into a hug. _

_ "We knew this arrangement wouldn't be easy, didn't we?" He nodded and leaned forward, pressing his forehead to hers. "I don't want to say goodbye." _

_ "Then don't." He leaned his forehead against hers. "Ever." He caressed her cheek. She looked up at him. _

_ "I like this new, romantic side of you." Her lips curved into an alluring smile. There was something new in her eyes; warm and inviting… It made a warmth spring up inside him… She reached down and took his hands in hers. The contact was electric…  _

_ "I'm still learning." _

_ "You're doing wonderfully. " That look again… He couldn't resist. He leaned in, capturing her lips with his… She felt so soft… fit so perfectly against him… They had kissed many times before; mostly short and simple. The newness of their relationship had been explored gradually: a touch here, a kiss there, cuddling when they could… But that look in her eyes… It was the first time he'd seen it… The first time she had looked at him with… whatever it was… _

_ She moaned and deepened the kiss, hands going behind his head, fingers in his hair, lips parting… His tongue began to duel with hers and he felt her smile into it. His hands couldn't stop exploring her body as he lowered them into the sand… _

_ "Heero…" She moaned his name as his hand massaged her breasts… They were soft but firm and fit perfectly in his hand… His left hand, which had been cradling her head, threaded into her hair and pulled out the obnoxious ribbon… Her own hands ran down the muscles of his back, where she surprised him by grabbing his ass! She giggled into his lips as he pressed himself closer, her moans and sighs mingling with his… A fire sparked… He had always felt it - smoldering deep inside him with every touch… but this fire grew into a blaze that only her touch could both quench and stoke... _

_ If it hadn't been for the waves of the tide… _

Pagan had not been thrilled at having to wash the sand out of their clothes, but the waves lapping against them as they kissed, lying on the shore had been worth the older man's ire…

Following that rather heated moment, Heero had begun to actively wonder what it would be like to…’make love’ to her… Of course, that posed a whole new problem. As much as he ached for her he was...without practice. Hundreds of battles, life or death situations he had faced without flinching… but this…

He had no experience with women. Dr. J had kept his knowledge of such things down to the basics. He was taught the logistics of sex, but little else. In all honesty, he doubted the old man ever expected him to live long enough to copulate, much less find someone who would be willing….

As the day of Relena’s arrival had approached, Duo yet again took it upon himself to tease Heero…

_ He sat on the Maxwell's living room couch, controller in hand as he and Duo battled for superiority - using Duo’s gaming console. Heero’s midterms were finally over; now, he had to plan out exactly what else he and his… what he and Relena… would do.  _

_ "Thanks again… for picking up Relena’s present for me." _

_ "That's what us delivery boys do, pally. Of course, I was kinda concerned when you asked me for a favor… Never punching you again…." Heero smirked. Duo cried out shortly after as he failed to score a point. _

_ "Damn! How are you better at my own games than me?! I play them all the time!" Duo's lips pressed into a small pout. _

_ "Maybe that's your problem," Hilde came up behind them and slid onto the seat next to her husband.  _

_ "Ah, babe! Not you too." He mock-whined. "Even my own wife gangs up on me." _

_ "Now, honey, you know I'm always on your side.” She kissed his cheek. _

_ "Yeah, I know." He paused the game and pulled her close. "So, tell me, Heero, you hoping to score this weekend?" Duo winked. Heero raised a brow.  _

_ "Score?" Basketball season hadn't started yet, but he had been practicing... _

_ "You know… score! Bring it home! Get lucky!" _

_ "Uh…." _

_ "Are you wanting to screw her, or what?" Hilde smacked him upside the head. "Ow!" _

_ "Don't be crude! That's my friend you're talking about." _

_ "Mine too, Babe, but he wasn't understanding…" Duo's meaning finally hit. Did Heero hope to have sex with Relena…?  _

_ "It had… crossed my mind… but," he turned his eyes back to the television. "I don't know if she will want to…" _

_ "You're kidding?" _

_ "She is the one who said no labels or commitments...sex is a pretty big commitment …" _

_ "Depends on the contex-oof!" Hilde elbowed him. _

_ "Go get yourself a beer!" _

_ "Fine, fine, I know when I'm not wanted." Duo stood up and she swatted his ass affectionately as he walked away.  _

_ "I love him, but sometimes he can be so clueless." She looked over at Heero. _

_ "Relena isn't like that…"  _

_ Hilde shook her head. "Duo knows that. He was just being crude." She sighed. "But, I think he has a point. I think...Relena would be willing." _

_ "How do I…tell?"  _

_ "If she wants to?" He nodded. "You could ask her… but, honestly, sometimes, it's just best to let it happen naturally. When the time is right, you'll know."  _

_ Heero considered her words... _

_ "Just make sure you give as well as you get. Maybe better." Hilde added. Heero was, again, confused. He must have looked it because the brunette laughed. "Pleasure, Heero." She smiled. "Women have needs, just like men, but we usually need a lot more stimulation before we can... uh, fully enjoy ourselves…" Again, he must have looked as clueless as he felt because she shook her head and looked at the ceiling. "Men." She turned her attention back to him. "My advice? Do some research. Read some romance novels; the smutty kind. Look at some magazines… watch some videos… That way, when the time comes, you'll know what to do…"  _

_ Duo returned just as they finished their talk and plopped himself back down, a cold beer in each hand. He offered one to his wife. She took it, cracked it open and smiled as she snuggled into her husband.  _

* * *

Heero had taken Hilde’s advice about the research. Some of it, he had rather not remember, but the majority would prove helpful should the occasion arise… And he couldn't help hoping it would…

He jumped on his motorcycle and smiled. The present had taken two weeks, including the delivery; the wait, and the cost had been worth it. His other preparations would be completed within the next few hours… He just hoped Relena would like it. Deciding to go the extra mile, he'd ordered two dozen, long-stemmed red roses… They reminded him of when he found her in the garden with the twisted ankle… He had been shocked to see her crying… And she'd been feverish. 

_ "I'm so glad I'm not alone," Relena stated as they sat back to back. _

_ "Were you…" he reached over and wiped a tear from her eye. "Were you crying?" Her eyes widened, eyebrows shooting up. "I thought you were stronger than that." _

_ "I'm human too!" She huffed and turned from him.  _

She had ranted at him about how she never got to rest... How her work was never done… He didn't know what to think as she spoke. It had all confused him at the time… __

_ "But I'd be glad if you'd show up and see me every so often… That way I'd still have the strength to go on…"  _

She passed out after that and he hadn't understood what she'd meant, then… But now… He had carried her inside that day and finished the treaty for her… It had been their secret - under the roses… 

"Our secret…" He smiled to himself. He had kept his plans for her visit a secret as well. After Duo brought the one-year anniversary to Heero’s attention, he began to look for a way to make her visit special. The locals of the colony had a festival every year to celebrate the season. He had been aware of the annual celebration, but had never had a good reason to care. Until now.

Looking into it further, he found that they had booths and games and contests for all to participate in. He thought, given her lack of ability to get out and be normal herself, that a festival would be just the thing… And afterward - after dinner and the festival. He would tell her… 

He made it to the platform as the shuttle docked, the air lock brakes grinding and squealing as it came to rest at a complete halt. He saw her guards before he saw her. They were doing a poor job of blending in with their dark suits and glasses. Heero rolled his eyes. They may as well have just worn their standard issue Preventer jackets and badges. As always, Jenkins glared at him on sight, but none of that mattered as she stepped off the shuttle and into his arms.

Heero all but crushed her to him, taking in her smell and the feel of her body against his. They pulled apart just enough for him to crush his lips to hers in a long-overdue kiss. When they broke apart, she took his hands in hers and smiled. 

"I missed you." She said. He leaned his forehead against hers.

"Are you hungry?" He was eager to get her away… Alone…

"I have been craving Chinese food since I left," she stated.

"I know a good place." He tugged at her hand. "Come on!" He broke into a run with her following and giggling behind him. He could hear Jenkins and the other guards protesting, but the couple reached Heero’s bike long before her bodyguards could do anything about their escape. 

"Get on." He commanded as he handed her a helmet. He felt her arms wrap snugly against his abdomen. Casting a satisfied smirk at Jenkins before his bike roared to life, he flipped the shield of his helmet down and the two of them sped off down the road.

Feeling her warm body against him as they cruised down the small colony roads made him feel… Content. For the first time in months. He felt her snuggle her head into his leather jacket and the rise and fall of her breasts against him as she sighed… It made him wish they were already there - at his apartment… Where he could have her alone… But, first, they needed food. And his helpers needed time to set up the rest of his surprises….

Duo was in charge of delivering the roses. And the gift. Heero had ordered them to be delivered for the loft. They would not have made it on the bike… He couldn't wait to give her the things he’d bought her… And maybe, just maybe… finally show her how much he…

They arrived at the restaurant before he could finish that thought. He parked the bike and kicked the stand but was reluctant to move further. She gripped him tighter as he moved and he chuckled.

"You have to let go if we're going to eat."

“Just a moment longer…” she pleaded. He smiled and felt her head resting on his shoulder. After an unknown amount of time passed, she loosened her grip and they dismounted the bike. He took the opportunity to grab her hand and pull her into his arms. He kissed her gently before she buried her face in his chest. 

“Come on,” He smiled and stepped back, taking her hand in his. Relena raised a brow, one corner of her mouth turned up into a curious half smile. He merely offered her what he hoped was a charming, crooked smile in response. She linked her arm in his, tucking her head into his shoulder as they made their way in. 

Xiǎolóng wǎncān was a small, locally owned shop a few blocks from campus where he and his roommates often ordered from on the later nights. He had always found the food enjoyable and the atmosphere as close to what he imagined authentic as a colony could get. The smells of chicken frying and rice boiling mixed with incense as some nondescript Asian music floated down from the speakers above. The overall color scheme consisted of red, black and gold with various scrolls and artwork hanging on the walls around them. 

He ordered the chicken lo mein, chicken fried rice and teriyaki chicken strips. She ordered the beef and broccoli with a side of steamed rice. He smirked. He knew she would eat his food; knew she would pick off his plate. Both had hot tea. Conversation consisted largely on what their lives had been like in the last few months since they last met. Her job was trying as always and she was still the de facto babysitter and peacekeeper between the many politicians. She had renegotiated three trade deals and two treaties in three months - an impressive feat. He listened intently while answering her questions about his schooling.

“I know basketball hasn’t started up yet, but when it does, I'm going to catch as many games as I can… I followed every game that I could last season… Earth doesn’t get extremely good reception, but thankfully they stream online as well…” The guilt in her eyes at the thought of missing any of his games bothered him. He shook his head.

“You never have to watch any of them.” 

“I know…. But still… I want you to know that I try… that I want to…”

“I know.” He reached over and grabbed her hand. The idea that something he did was so important to her meant more than he ever thought it could. After a lifetime of being alone, of having no one care where he was, let alone what he did, it was nice to have someone… Someone who truly cared... 

The rest of the meal was eaten in relative comfortable silence. She ended up eating more of his food than her own (as he predicted); Heero paid the bill. 

“Wait!” Relena giggled.

“What?” Heero raised a brow.

“We have to read our fortunes, remember?” Heero glanced down at the tiny, folded wafer in the plastic wrapper. Before her, he always just saved the cookie for Duo, but if it made her happy… He nodded and picked up the cookie, opened the plastic and cracked it in half. She did the same and smiled as she read the message on the tiny slip of paper. 

“What does it say?” Heero asked, but she held up a finger as she shoved one half of the cookie between her lips and chewed it to oblivion, followed by the other… he was hypnotized by her mouth… so pink and supple…

“I had to eat the cookie first.” He raised a brow. “I was told that if you truly like the fortune you need to eat the cookie before you tell anyone. It's supposed to increase the chances of the fortune coming true.” He nodded as a blush tinged her cheeks. "It's silly, isn't it? But… it was something father told me…” She had never mentioned that to him. As he thought back on it, she always had eaten the cookie first...

“I understand.” Heero looked down at his own fortune, his lips curling into a genuine smile. He popped the cookie halves into his mouth and devoured them. 

“I’ll tell mine first. Then you, ok?” Again, Heero nodded. “Here it goes,” She gave him an ornery smirk that lit a fire inside him… “Many surprises are in store, you need only embrace the moments.” The cookie wasn’t wrong. He had many things planned. “Now you.” Her eyes sparkled with anticipation.

“Many pleasures await you if patience is your ally.”

“Many pleasures, huh?” She smiled… There was that look in her eyes again… the same one from the beach… it wasn’t as intense; just a sample of what it had been that day… but still… He had eaten the cookie first…

* * *

They left the restaurant and drove to the square where the festival was being held. Again, Her arms around him were as tight as she could manage, this time, her head rested on his shoulder as he leaned over the handlebars. A small spot opened between two cars, just right for parking. Smaller vehicles were used in the colonies due to the limited space so bikes of all kinds and compact cars were the preferred and most common form of transportation. Public transportation had their own designated areas - to keep confusion to a minimum and manage space efficiently. 

He kicked the stand down and they dismounted, leaving their helmets behind. As the red hair from the wig tumbled free he couldn’t help but long to see the honey colored tresses hiding below… She smiled at him and that thought was forgotten as she took his hand. The smell of novelty fried foods and oil from the various engines filled the evening air.

“Oh! A street festival! Heero! How did you know I’ve always wanted to attend one?” The corners of his lips turned into a small smile.

“Lucky guess.” He shrugged and offered her a grin and she playfully pushed him. “Where would you like to start?”

“The games! I’ve always wanted someone to win me a stuffed animal.” He stared at her, eyebrow raised. “I mean, teddy bears are excellent gifts. I love the ones you’ve given me but-”

“I understand.” Heero smiled and she once more hooked her arm in his. “Let's go.” He led her over to the booths. Heero had been warned by Duo that the vendors usually rigged their games. A quick observation at each booth gave him the general idea of the adjustments necessary to make the desired goal a certainty. He could easily have cleaned out each shop if he so chose, but motorcycles weren’t conducive to transporting an entire amusement park’s worth of prizes. He let her pick the one she wanted most: the ring toss had a blue and silver stuffed unicorn that she just had to have. It took him only one try before the fluffy toy was in her arms… Where he would rather be… 

"Heero, look!"

She tugged his hand to a vendor stand that served fresh, hot, apple cider. The moan she made as she took her first sip stirred that fire again... He took a moment to subtly adjust himself before enjoying his own glass of the caramel colored drink. He had to admit: it was good. They watched a potter work on his wheel and a woman operate an old-fashioned loom… Though fires were not permitted on the colony, the artificial flame of a nearby “camp” gave off the same sort of smell: woodsy and rich. 

They split an elephant ear and sampled a 'funnel cake'; both of which were far simpler and more enjoyable than their names implied. The first was crisp with a cinnamon and sugar overlay. He watched intently as her slender fingers disappeared behind her red lips as she licked the sticky topping off of them… The second was almost fluffy with powdered sugar sprinkled copiously on top. He didn't know which he preferred but she seemed to equally enjoy both.  _ He _ enjoyed getting to lick the powdered sugar off her lips… 

They rode a few rides together, both that required a snug fit, not that he was complaining. Her peels of childlike laughter echoed over the hum of the engines as the round and circles competed with the back and forth in ways not unlike some mobile suit battles. Still, the force of the ride kept her pressed into his side. That was an acceptable side benefit. 

The carousel and ferris wheel were, from what he could tell, her favorites. The way she clung to the metallic pole atop the ceramic horse and reached for the ring harkened to her days as an equestrian. She had been lucky enough to retrieve the brass ring from the extended mechanical arm. Supposedly such a thing used to be commonplace. The one to retrieve the brass ring was given a free ride. She offered it, instead, to a child that clearly wished for a try… He smiled. The gratitude in the mother's eyes was truly rewarding.

He decided he was not a fan of the ferris wheel. The gondolas, ten in all, were evenly spaced and set to rotate safely in correspondence with the main motion of the gigantic, metal structure. There were no straps for safety and the sides did not come up far enough for him to feel like she was safe… Still, the look of contentment as she watched the night lights from her place in his arms had been another unexpected bonus. She sighed and tucked her head into his arm.

"I wish…" she stopped herself. He knew what she was thinking. It was a thought they shared as the ride continued its slow and steady path.

"I know." He kissed the top of her head as she heaved another sigh. 

When the ride was over, he escorted her back to his bike for the final portion of their evening. They sped down the road until they reached the shop out back of the Maxwell home. He hoped Duo came through with the surprise. As he unlocked the door and flipped the light switch, Relena stepped in behind him. After the door closed, he turned to her and captured her lips in a quick, gentle kiss. Relena smiled and reached up, removing the Bobby pins before taking the cap and red wig off. Heero's breath caught in his throat as the simple beauty of the familiar golden locks falling freely down her back as she shook them free.

"Much better." He had to agree. She followed him to the ladder that led into the loft. He let her go first. Duo had better come through…

"Oh, Heero! It's…" His head rose above the opening and his mouth dropped in shock. 

The two dozen roses were, indeed, in the vases he selected with the blue ribbons; the present - boxed and wrapped in deep blue metallic paper and a silver bow sat between them… However… scattered all over the floor, leading to the already folded-out bed, were hundreds of rose petals. Candles - recently lit, he noticed, created a low-lit ambiance that was… Overkill. And speaking of kill...

'When I get my hands on him-'

"You did all of this… for me?" Relena turned to him, eyes shining, candlelight creating an ethereal glow around her… The candles were a nice touch but the rose petals…

"Duo did the rose petals." She giggled.

"I figured," She walked to him, gently grabbing his shirt and leaning in. "I love the roses…" she kissed his lips softly. "Thank you, Heero... for everything…" he pulled her closer and kissed her deeply, the flame inside him sparking back to life… They broke apart and she giggled while he rested his forehead against hers. He led her over to the foldout bed.

"Sit." He commanded in a soft, husky voice. She obeyed, smiling up at him. He moved to get her present, the small box. He handed it to her.

"Heero?" Her brow raised, a coy smile on her lips. "What's the occasion?"

"You." He smiled. "Open it." With one last glance at him, she pulled the ribbon free and unwrapped the box. As she lifted the lid, a look of pure confusion and wonder filled her eyes. A glass charm full of sand was partially encased by intricate silver roses in a silver chain. She held it up.

"Sand?" He nodded and made his way over to sit next to her. 

"From our beach…" Her eyes widened, brows raised in surprise before they pinched in the center as tears pricked her eyes.

"I'm not good with words… You changed my life… me… from the day we met…" he took her hands in his. "You are the reason I'm alive…"

"Heero?"

"We said no commitments...no labels… but, I can't...live like that…anymore." He stared into her eyes. "I want you. Only you." He reached up and brushed a tear from her cheek with his hand. "I want…  _ need _ us... to be official…" 

"You're sure?" In answer, he kissed her; not hard or passionate, but in that kiss he tried to convey what he couldn't say. When they broke, she braced herself against him. 

"This won't change anything… the long distance… the secrecy…"

"I don't care…" He leaned forward, resting his head against her shoulder. "As long as I know… that you're mine…I can handle it… all of it…" She reached up and lifted his head to look into his eyes.

"I've always been yours." Her answer made his heart leap as his stomach jumped and his pulse raced… But, confusion clouded his momentary happiness. If she was always his… 

"Then why… why did you want… to keep things open…?" Her eyes went to his shoulder as she clutched his shirt.

"For the same reason I tried to keep you away…" Her lips turned down into a frown. "I wanted you to have other options… In case you met… someone else… someone better for-" his stomach knotted; heart twisting in pain at the sadness in her tone...

"Stop." 

"Heero?" Her eyes widened as they snapped back to his face.

"Stop… saying better… stop thinking that there is a better option for me." He stroked her cheek. "I told you, you are the only one I want… There is no one better. No one." He had to make her see… How could she still not understand…?

"Heero…"

"Please… Relena…" he brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear… "Let me… let me show you… how much you mean to me?" Tears pricked her eyes as a smile spread on her tempting lips. She nodded… He moved slowly, leaning forward to caress her cheek… her lips… with a gentle finger before leaning in and touching his lips softly to her own. 

She leaned forward into his kiss, wrapping her arms around his waist… He teased her lips with his tongue, asking entrance that she granted as their tongues began to dance… He pulled back long enough to look at her… to make sure she still wanted this… The look in her eyes…  _ that _ look… He couldn't help it. He captured her lips in a pressing kiss, his arms tightening to pull her closer. Her arms wound behind his neck, fingers tangling in his wild hair as his tongue coaxed her lips open… 

She moaned and their tongues resumed their dance. With one hand gently behind her neck and the other on the small of her back he slowly, gently pushed her down onto the bed, never breaking their kiss but being careful to heed her body language for any hesitancy.

Not only did she not hesitate, but she moved her hands down from his neck to his arms and back up. God, how he needed her! He moved his own hands to explore her curves as he had before on the beach. He broke their kiss and dipped his head down to savor the silken skin of her neck…. He licked her ear, down the side of her neck to the base where it met the clavicle. He began to suck and nibble the tender area…

"Heero..." She gasped his name and he froze, afraid that she would pull away… tell him to stop… but instead, her hands went under his arms to wrap around his shoulder and grab them, pulling him closer. He smiled into her skin and continued his slow exploration, raising up to capture her lips once more before pulling back. He took the bottom of her shirt in his hands and began to raise it up her body. She sat up and helped him remove it. His eyes roamed her exposed skin. She blushed under his gaze… He leaned forward and kissed her before reaching behind her to try and free her breasts of their confines… A low growl of frustration rumbled from his chest and she giggled, reaching back to undo it for him and as the silken fabric fell, his eyes roamed her again… she was…so...

"Perfect…" he murmured and she blushed deeper as he leaned forward and seized her lips in a searing kiss. He laid her down gently again, kissing his way down her neck while his hands explored her breasts… They filled his hands as though they were made for him; not too big, but not too small… just..

"Perfect…" he muttered again as he continued his path down to the succulent mounds... 

He flicked his tongue around the pebbled nub in the pinkish center… She gasped and her hands gently stroked his shoulders. He took her breast into his mouth while his right hand gently pinched the nipple of her other breast - eliciting a moan from her… He smirked, gave her right nipple one last nibble before giving her left breast the same oral treatment, one hand massaging her right breast as the other made its way down to the top of her jeans… His fingers fumbled with the button for just a moment before he met with success. 

He grinned around her breast and released it, giving each hardened nub one last tongue lashing before kissing a trail down her abdomen, licking occasionally to heighten the sensations. His tongue circled her navel before trailing to the top of her pants… He eased down the zipper with his teeth, his hands kneading her breasts as he looked up to find her watching him through heavy-lidded eyes; passion burned in their aqua depths. He tugged at her jeans and she raised her hips, allowing him to slide them down her slender legs… He placed a kiss on every inch of her creamy skin as more and more was bared to his gaze… And as he neared his true target, he hoped his research would pay off…

He kissed the inside of her thigh, sucking gently on the skin as he brought his hands down, one to support his weight and one to massage the skin of the other inner thigh. She emitted a low ‘humming’ sound as his fingers danced up her thigh to walk up and down her soaked panties. As he applied gentle pressure at the junction where her bundle of nerves lay, she moaned and shifted her legs. He smirked. His fingers dipped under the sides of her panties and ran his fingers up and down the moist insides of her slit… 

“Heero…” She gasped and his mouth stopped its ministrations on her inner thigh to move to her heated center… He wanted to rip off her underwear right then but this needed to be done delicately...

His eyes locked with hers, asking silently for her permission as he tugged on the flimsy fabric.  She nodded her head and he hooked his fingers in the elastic band, sliding them past her thighs, down her legs and off of her feet… an idea formed… He took her big toe in his mouth and gently sucked… She giggled. Not the response he was looking for. The magazine had said not all women would be into the same thing… He released her big toe and kissed his way back up her legs until his mouth hovered over her heated center… He slowly ran his fingers up and down the slit again before inserting one finger into her… 

She cried out softly and her head went back before she looked down at him. There was no mistaking the passion in her aqua eyes. He smiled up at her and latched his lips onto her clitoris, sucking it softly. She half whimpered, half sighed as he released the nub to massage it with his tongue… He inserted a second finger… She writhed again as her breathing hitched… she was getting close, but he wasn’t done yet.

He continued to suck and lick her clit, tonguing it for all he was worth as his two fingers pumped in and out of her…. He added a third… slowly stretching her out further… She nearly screamed as her hands fisted in his hair.

“Oh… yes…. Heero…” His fingers continued their lustful conquest of her center for a moment more before he removed them only to be replaced by his tongue. His thumb continued to rub her button as he felt her walls begin to clench… Her breathing was rapid and shallow…. She chanted his name and her entire body tensed as her orgasm tore through her.

“Heero!” He smiled and licked and sucked every last bit of her… He loved her taste… Tangy and yet, somehow, sweet.... He raised himself back up over her and claimed her lips with his own… She returned his kiss with equal passion and he felt his member straining painfully against his pants… he needed her! Needed her now! 

“Heero… I want to… to see you… to make you feel good too…” He kissed her tenderly and caressed her cheeks, still flushed from her orgasm.

“You will…” He undid his jeans and boxers and pulled them off as quickly as he could before walking to the bedside table and grabbing the box of condoms. He pulled one out, ripped the package and slipped one on before climbing back on the bed and covering her body with his. He positioned his cock above her entrance and his eyes locked with hers… 

“Relena… are you...are you ready?” She nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck. He leaned down and kissed her one last time as he thrust the tip in… slowly… He knew it would hurt if he went too fast. Given her years of horseback riding there was a chance her hymen was already gone, but nonetheless, she would need time to adjust… Slowly, he inserted more and more of himself into her. She was so warm and tight… He felt himself being squeezed and the sheer pleasure of it made his vision flash... 

She grimaced into his kiss but he deepened it to try and distract from the pain as he reached down with his right hand to massage her clit again… Finally he felt himself slide completely in… He broke the kiss and locked eyes with her. “Are you.. Okay?” He gasped out, using every last ounce of his self control not to begin thrusting. She nodded.

“Yes… I’m… better than okay…” she smiled up at him… “Please… make love to me.” He grinned and kissed her again as he pulled himself almost completely out before slowly going back in… He began to build up a rhythm, letting her moans and gasps be his encouragement as his pace quickened; in and out in and out over and over… the faster he went, the more she began to pant. 

“Heero…ungh!” she groaned and her arms latched around him allowing her hands to roam up and down his back where she grabbed his ass to pull him closer. He couldn’t hold on any longer. He felt that fire burning, building within him and raging out of control as he drove in, to the hilt over and over and over, moaning her name. Finally, he felt it: her walls were spasming around him and her body tensed as she erupted in another orgasm. The pressure of which proved too much for him… with one last hard thrust, he buried himself inside her and came…

“Relena!” He cried out before he collapsed on top of her, still buried in her heat; his arms hugged her to him as though he would die without her. He lowered his head to the crook of her neck and placed a gentle kiss, there; the sounds of their labored breathing filled the room. He raised up and looked into her eyes to see her crying! She was crying?! He wiped her tears away, concern seizing his heart.

“Relena…?” She smiled at him, eyes sparkling with something… something he had seen in them many times but had never been able to name… “Did I hurt you?” She shook her head, a smile forming on her perfect lips.

“No… no, Heero… not at all…” Her voice was light… jovial… content…

“But… you’re… crying…?” She let out a low, soft feminine chuckle…

“Because I’m happy.” He felt his brow raise in confusion. “I’m so happy, Heero.” He brushed some hair out of her face.

“You are?” 

“Yes.” He moved to lie beside her, and pulled her close. She nestled her head into the crook of his neck, arms around him. He needed this… he needed her… for the rest of his life...

"Be my girlfriend." He said in a low voice. She stiffened against him for a moment.

"Heero-"

"You said you've always been mine… So… why not make it official?" She pushed away from him and rose up on one elbow to look at him.

"Nothing will change. Our lives… the way we've been living…" He couldn't help but feel confused. 

"Why not?" 

"What?"

"Why can't things change? If we're together; a couple… then why can't they?"

"Heero…"

"I can transfer to Earth… to a closer school. I could rent a place in town-"

"Heero-"

"We don't have to be apart, Relena. I can understand wanting to keep it a secret. If that's what you want, then we'll do it… just...please… give this… us… a chance." He caressed her cheek. After a moment, she closed her eyes and sighed.

"You're sure this is really what you want?" In answer, he leaned in and kissed her. It wasn't long, but in it he tried to convey all that he felt. When the kiss broke, he caressed her cheek.

"Please." He whispered, eyes locking with hers.

"Yes, Heero." She smiled and buried her head into his chest. "Yes." He pulled her closer, his heart finally feeling complete. No matter what the next two years held, they would face it together.


End file.
